While it is still called ‘Today’
“Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.” Psalm 95:7b
I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about Psalm 95 lately. I printed it out and stuck it on my fridge. It is a part of the Anglican Book of Common Prayer’s morning prayer. I keep pausing and meditating at this verse, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.” The author of Hebrews refers to it multiple times, placing particular emphasis on the word ‘today’. The implication is that the invitation to enter God’s rest continues to us today—this very day—right now. Will we accept? Or will we harden our hearts?
The words just prior to the ‘today’ in Psalm 95 are, “Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker! For he is our God, and we are the people of his pasture and the sheep of his hand.” We are still invited to attend to the voice of our good Shepherd (John 10), revealed as Jesus Christ, and believe that He is trustworthy enough for us to follow in all circumstances. He beckons us to the place of rest beside the still waters that our souls long for (Psalm 23). The Israelites failed to attend to that voice and God’s response was, ‘They always go astray in their heart; they have not known my ways. . .. They shall not enter my rest (Ps 95: 10-11).” I think this is not so much an angrily imposed punishment as it is a frustrated Father’s release of a rebellious child to the natural result of their choice to go their own way. They think the Father is working against them rather than deeply and sacrificially FOR them. That breaks the Father’s heart.
How might our hearts get hardened like that? We shake our heads in disbelief at the willful Israelites, but are we in just as much danger of choosing to die in the wilderness, wandering for years, when promised rest is all the time ours to simply enter into? According to the author of Hebrews, hard-heartedness is simply a failure to trust. We deceive ourselves, forgetting God’s faithfulness—“though they had seen my works”—grasping for and demanding control of our own lives. We doubt His goodness. We feel sorry for ourselves when things don’t go according to our plans. We put Him to the test over and over again, preferring a life of anxiety and fear to the rest that He invites us to enjoy. We ignore the wise guidance of the Shepherd, and if He asks us to slow down and let Him carry our burdens, we rebel because we’d really rather carry them ourselves, despite everything we might say to the contrary.
Unfortunately, we are all guilty. We can’t help it. Spiritual Director and psychiatrist Gerald D. May writes in his book Care of Mind, Care of Spirit, “Everyone will resist surrendering attachment to the importance of self-image. . .. Unconsciously, the self-image is engaged in a life-or-death battle, and although all conscious intents may be in the direction of spiritual surrender and dying-to-self a host of unconscious defenses will be brought to bear in order to preserve, bolster, and re-assert that image of self (p. 59).” Even when we believe that our Shepherd is good and can be trusted, our instincts (Paul calls this “the flesh”) will always push us to grab control. We wake up one day and realize that we have been wandering around in a frantic daze and have completely lost sight of our Shepherd.
However, even when we rebel in this way, following too much “the devices and desires of our own hearts” (again from the BCP morning prayer), and find our hearts growing hard, we have hope. We can return to trust. Our Shepherd is calling our name. We tune our ears to His voice again and turn our bodies in His direction. “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16).” We must repeatedly let go of our stubbornness and allow our hearts to soften again to His love and generous provision. Our attitude of confidence is possible because of the cross, the place where our Shepherd proved His heart and commitment to us. And now, today, just as we can draw attention to our tense jaw muscle and will it to relax, so we can turn out attention to our grasping, controlling fist and, asking for the Shepherd’s help, loosen our grip on our self-will and enjoy the delight of surrendering to His lead, knowing that He is unfailingly for us.
