Pondering: Psalm 4

Be angry!

Name it, feel it, 

Admit it for God’s sake

This burning thirst for vengeance

Must cover a deeper ache 

A righteous cry for repentance  

A fierceness that conceals a fragile child who takes

Refuge in the protection of defiance

But stay the hand that would do violence 

The tongue that in strict confidence 

Would undo a man with venomous compliance

The heart that would poison itself with bitter remembrance

Ponder your own heart

On your beds

In Silence

Ponder

Wait

Listen

In Silence

For as long as it takes

Then out of the softened soul

Gradually releasing its guarded defense

The small voice of the child is heard

And the tight, aching thirst relents

What sacrifice is more right 

Than a broken and contrite reverence

Of undeserved forgiveness 

Through a perfect One’s obedience 

And a laying upon the altar unjust grievance

That merely reveals bruised pride, unreasonable need 

Preponderance towards greed 

Or self-reliance 

And then

With the needs of the fragile child admitted 

The misspoken accusation rescinded 

And the protector giants quieted and still

The soul’s sigh of release will

Reveal at last what that anger meant to unveil

Whether there is required utterance 

a righteous cry for repentance

Or continued patience and silence

Forgiveness must from the forgiven prevail

For there is no real vengeance

Except that which belongs to the Healer

Yet deliverance belongs to the newly healed